More and more I see well intended but incomplete advocacy for #malesuicide prevention. “Men should talk”, or “man can cry” I hear daily. Do I think these campaigns are good? Yes, absolutely. Do I think they are good enough? No. Because new research is emerging to show that the epidemic of male suicide is not primarily a mental health crisis. Neither is it caused by a single problem, and it cannot be solved through “talking”. Suicide in simple terms, is often men’s ‘rational’ response to a build up structural problems or personal stressors. Things like child custody, family courts, being a victim of abuse, unemployment, debt, relationship breakdown, loneliness, or experiences of childhood sexual assault. All the unpopular things advocates are *not* talking about. I have never seen a male suicide campaign talk about corrupt family courts, despite loss of child custody being one of the biggest risk factors for suicide in men. I’ve never seen a comprehensive campaign for male victims of domestic violence, despite 11% of abused men attempting suicide. I have never seen anything other than contempt heaped at the feet of single, lonely, unemployed men - who are the group most at risk to suicide. All I hear are tears and talk, and tears and talk, and no effort to actually listen to, or act upon, the issues men are already talking about. I see people selling their book. I see a lot of people launching albums, or acting careers. I see impossibly handsome men in man buns wringing their hands, and flagellating themselves over how much they care – but then failing to do the dirty work required to prove it. And yes it is dirty work. Advocacy is not supposed to be easy. It’s supposed to be hard. It’s supposed to be about helping others, not about helping yourself… to look good. So why the reluctance to talk about the issues shaping male suicide? Loneliness, domestic abuse, unemployment, family courts, sexual assault, the lack of male services, fatherlessness… Where are our noble advocates now? So who is helping suicidal men, and who is exploiting them? Images by Kiwi Hug, Karen Sewell, Yosh Ginsu, Fadkera Official, Andrews Siimon #malesuicideawareness

2023-04-02