“The patriarchy”, “toxic masculinity”, “the manosphere”. The central problem with each of these phrases is that nobody really knows what you’re talking about. If you get 100 people to write down their definition of ‘the patriarchy’, I promise you, you’ll end up with 100 angry scribbles… none of them the same. And unless you can clearly define and measure a problem, you will never solve it. So instead of solutions we get “well that’s not what I mean”, “you don’t understand”, or “you’re misrepresenting me”; as someone whips out their gender studies diploma, another quotes me Bell Hooks, and someone else barfs out a deluge of word-salad slop. Soon, all of these words, in their various iterations, become a vague bludgeon to beat men over the heads with. A maddening chorus of poorly-formulated slogans, intended only to signal disapproval, like some giant bucket of mud into which any man with whom you disagree can be flung, and forgotten about. All issues, all bad actions, all evil men, from all over the world, and from all moments in history, not matter how random and disparate, are unceremoniously dumped into one or more of these buckets, smeared with mud, so as to try and silence them. I’ve seen “the patriarchy” blamed for everything from the gender pay gap, to women not having pockets. Used to explain violent men, violent women, male CEOs, male homeless and everyone in-between. I’ve seen “toxic masculinity” berated for gang violence, for Brexit, and for people not wearing masks during COVID 19. I’ve watched people shake their fists at “the manosphere”, with no consistent definition of what it actually is. I mean – Have you not noticed how long people have been swinging a sword at each of these cultural phenomenas, and yet none of them have gone away? And so, we arrive at the idea of ‘problem solvers’ and ‘problem sellers’. Problem solvers break the issues down into their smallest components, clearly labelled, defined and dissected, so they can be solved. Problem sellers squash problems together, so we lose all semblance of nuance, and instead create a gargantuan blob, and eternal supervillian that is impossible to defeat. So which one are you?

2026-10-15