Advocacy for men and boys, particularly in male suicide, has grown exponentially over the last few years; and yet, in the UK, 2024 was the worst year this century for British men ending their own lives.

And so, despite the effort and kind words, the issues are not getting better, in fact, they seem to be getting worse.

I’m sorry, but no, all this pleaing for men’s tears and talk is not the silver bullet we had hoped.

And far too often, advocacy for men and boys is just a repackaged form of victim blaming.

Telling men who die young to “go to the doctor more”, or suggesting boys who are behind in education to “try harder”, or lecturing suicidal men “to talk more” is unhelpful, and offensive.

So, has the world become stuck at this ideological roadblock, of “talk more”, “cry more”, “be less toxic”?

Why do we see men as the sole instigators and architects of their own pain?

And will we ever look outward, outside of men, and toward external, structural causes of their distress, if we are ever to truly help our fathers, sons, brothers, husbands, and friends?

~
In discussion with @vansh.xyz at The Human Lens.

Full podcast here https://tinyurl.com/3xmkpkdz

2025-10-29